How could you not offer them that ego boost? It is better to tell them now that nothing is going to happen between the two of you than to let them believe that they have a shot. But at the same time, I wouldn't want this to lead to the girl being clingy just because I gave her that special attention that she needed. I mean, even with my busy life I am still lonely right now when it comes to dating and I know there are girl friends of mine that are in the same position but I am not going to date them because we are not attracted to each other and we don't have that spark. Now whether you are considering agreeing to a pity date, have been on a pity date, or know someone who has done one of the two, it is time for a reality check. Sure, they might feel good about the date and themselves for a while. I have my own job and I make my own money and on top of that I am working towards getting a fantastic degree which will land me my dream career. You alone can decide what to do with yourself. People want to go on dates with people that are actually interested in them. Talk with him and explain how you feel, but you need to continually assure him that simply because you don't love in romantically doesn't mean that no one else will. And don't pay attention to anyone who complains about you "friendzoning" him. I want to be the one who wines and dines the girl and spoils her.
Yes, he does have depression and other problems, but that in no way entitles him to you. Would you have fun on a date if you realized they only went on the date because they felt sorry for you? You feel the way you feel, and if you see him as family I reiterate, a pity date is not a chance for an ego boost. If you are bored you should do things with your life that make you happy and give your life some fulfillment. The fact is that if you are going on a pity date with someone regardless of who asked who , you are wasting their time. How could you not offer them that ego boost? Besides, you don't need to be in a relationship with someone to be happy. You don't go out with people just because they treat you as a genuine human being instead of like an object. You can be flattered without getting their hopes up, spending their money, and wasting their time. I know he's a good guy, but if he believes rejection means the end of everything for him and that no one loves him, he needs psychiatric help, not a relationship. He isn't emotionally ready for a relationship if he's suicidal. Now, I know some of you out there go on pity dates with people because you think no one else wants to go on a date with them. Let them date someone who is interested in them romantically and you do the same. That's ridiculous and sexist. No one wants to be pitied. Pity - only if I was genuinely attracted to the person. Yes, you can still be friends. No one wants the humiliation of knowing they're not the one who you want and they can't be the one to make you happy. Ultimately, you know that you are not interested in this person but you go on a date with them anyway. Just be honest with them. I don't think it's good to date just because you're lonely because you may become clingy and rely on the person you are dating to bring you all the happiness you crave. Nothing is worse than thinking you had a chance when you never did. I don't want to date someone to be better off financially. His wants and needs do not in any way need to affect yours.
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